- As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools
- Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- Black holes are where God divided by zero.
- God must love stupid people; he made so many.
- Jesus died for my sins and all I got was this lousy T-shirt.
- Jesus is coming; everyone look busy.
- Jesus loves you; everyone else thinks your an asshole.
- Jesus may love you, but he won't respect you in the morning.
- Jesus paid for our sins... now let's get our money's worth.
- Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere may be happy.
- Televangelists: The Pro Wrestlers of religion.
- The Meek shall inherit the earth... after we're through with it.
- The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.
- Want a taste of religion? Bite a minister.
One-Liners (Religion)
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