Vocabulary

Abdicate - v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

Balderdash - n. A rapidly receding hairline.

Bustard - n. A very rude Metrobus driver.

Carcinoma - n. A valley in California, notable for its heavy smog.

Circumvent - n. The opening in the front of boxer shorts.

Coffee - n. A person who is coughed upon.

Esplanade - v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.

Flabbergasted - adj. Appalled over how much weight you have gained.

Flatulence - n. The emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

Gargoyle-n. An olive-flavoured mouthwash.

Willy-nilly - adj. Impotent.

Lymph - v. To walk with a lisp.

Marionettes - n. Residents of Washington D.C. who have been jerked around by the mayor.

Negligent - adj. Describes a condition in which you absent-mindedly answer the door in your nightie.

Oyster - n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.

Rectitude - n. The formal, dignified demeanour assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.

Semantics - n. Pranks conducted by young men studying for the priesthood, including such things as gluing the pages of the priest's prayer book together just before vespers.